Liar!

When I first started losing pounds - after the first ten or twelve easy ones - I was amazed to find myself appreciating the "hunger pangs" I occasionally felt. They were honest; they were not a blood sugar crash precipitated by an unbalanced, crappy meal and an out of whack insulin response. Hunger was empowering and invigorating.

Hunger was an affirmation that I was accomplishing a long sought-after goal.

But I'm struggling these days - still healthier than ever, still running and training for a half-marathon (32 days and counting), still love seeing the thinner, vibrant face in the mirror - but damn I am slipping back into the old habit of kow-towing to my hunger!! The slightest twinge of hunger and I start thinking of food.

And of course work time is the worst time: even when I have healthy meals and healthy snacks available to me, I still manage to down a few handfuls of candy, a brownie...even a good old fashioned sugary Pepsi! The food culture where I work is very generous to a snack-junkie. It's a good thing I only work four days a week!

I'm even back to lying to myself: if I don't eat that extra piece of pizza now, I'm just going to get hungry later and eat twice as much. If I allow today to be a "treat day", I'll get back in gear tomorrow...or maybe the next day. Hell, it's the weekend, I'll get my focus back on Monday. A Snickers bar will make me feel all better after that last ugly phone call...blah, blah, effing blah.

Liar!
I want my focus back - NOW; I want to get back in gear - NOW; I want the good hunger pangs back, the ones I called my friends. I want the unerring strength and power those hunger pangs gave me, the feeling of subjugating a transient and false craving in service to a slimmer, stronger, healthier body.

I want to stop lying to myself and get back to fixing myself - inside and out.

Love That White Powder

No, that was 30 years ago. But the magnetism, the ability to damage my health, the ability to derail my life, and the loss of integrity and self-respect is the same.

This...

Sugar. I love it. I hate it. I hate to love it. And sometimes, it owns me.

It boggles my mind how I can be perfectly satisfied with a good, filling, healthy meal...and 5 minutes later start considering a visit to the candy machine at work. Maybe I'll have an apple or grapefruit instead. I love grapefruit. And then five minutes later...M&Ms? A Twix bar? Maybe a 4-pack of chocolate Zingers??

Hi, my name is Scott and I'm a sugar-addict. I let sugar control my life. I have even let it affect my health, my relationships, and my job.

My job is where the cravings hit most often. Which is a good indicator that it has nothing to do with hunger. It's the false sense of contentment, euphoria, and pleasure that comes with a mouthful of sugar. And it evaporates the second I'm back at my desk with phone ringing.

I need to work on this...and I know I can't do it alone. Help!

Done and Done

Two of my goals for this year are completed. And, just for something different - they don't even involve me!
Minda now has new eyeglasses - and she looks (and sees) sharp!

Andrew's upper palette has been expanded and four weeks from today, he will have the bands for his braces installed. The neat thing was to see him embrace the fortitude to do what had to be done (once daily turning of a crank that basically spread the bones in the roof of his mouth a quarter-millimeter each day). After a few days of Papa doing it for him, he took over and did it himself most mornings. And the results were impressive.

Yes, those catty-wampus (TexanSpeak) teeth are just a step in the right direction toward a beautiful smile!

And though I suspect I won't reach my goal of dropping 82 pounds by November 1, I am down 62 pounds from my all-time high of 288 pounds. And I continue to run (averaging 20 miles per week). And I am training for my first half-marathon in October.

And most importantly, I am LIVING and, God willing, I plan on living a long, healthy and enjoyable life!

Now on to the Finish Line!

Finish line for the Apple Blossom 10K race Minda and I ran in May 2011.

Great Article

Here's a great article on Ben Davis of BenDoesLife, the initial inspiration for me to lose my fat and find my life!

First Meeting - Done!

Sunday, Minda and I met Jody, Jessica and Vivian at the Lake Harriet Rose Garden. We waited 15 minutes for any latecomers, then headed off around the lake. Pretty hot and humid, but we walked and talked and then veered up into Linden Hills area for an iced coffee (Infinite Black - mmmmmm!) at the Dunn Brothers.

We talked about some of the things we struggle with and what we hoped to accomplish by banding together under the "What If I...Lived"banner. Mostly support, ideas and suggestions. Also want to get the WIIL FaceBook page up and running and an email chain to keep everyone informed.

We'll firm things up at our next meeting which is tentatively scheduled for after Labor Day.

Sorry for the rough post - typing it on the keyboard of the Google TV device we just picked up. The real computer is down for now, so this will have to do!

Time To Start Living!

If you’re looking for a way to get your life under control, lose a few pounds and reclaim the health you once enjoyed, I have no magic bullet to get you there. But in my own journey to lose 53 pounds (and counting) I have learned that you have a better chance of succeeding if you have a team rooting for your success and struggling alongside you with their own goals in sight.

And that’s where What If I Lived can help – you and me. I know that by helping others achieve their goals, I will stay focused on achieving my goals. And it works both ways!

Please join my wife, Minda and I on Sunday July 31 at 2:00 pm at Lake Harriet to find out more!

WHAT WE WILL DO:

*Share ideas for exercise, eating, and other aspects of healthy living.
*Encourage each other in our pursuit of healthy lifestyles – and balanced living.
*Plan healthy outings – an active day at the park with fresh air and healthy picnic beats an afternoon in front of the television ALMOST any day.
*Encourage each other to make changes in our lives.
*Encourage each other to set goals to achieve – and celebrate achieving those goals.
*Encourage each other to believe in ourselves.
*Affirm and re-affirm that we are NOT our past, our bad habits or our negative beliefs. We are all worthy of respect, friendship and happiness. And a long life!
WHAT WE WON'T DO:

*Plan a diet for you and enforce it,
*Belittle each other for failures,
*Force philosophy or dogma on each other,
*Expect you to follow a specific exercise or diet plan,
*Give up on you -- even if you do!

WHAT WE PLAN TO DO:

*Meet at Lake Harriet Rose Garden entrance on Sunday July 31st at 2:00 pm and:

*Take a pleasant stroll around the lake to:

*Discuss ideas for future meetings,
*Schedule a weekly exercise outing for those interested,
*Plan future outings,
*Discuss goal-setting and goal-achieving ideas and methods, and
*Discuss and encourage everyone to train for and participate in the Monster Dash 5K Run on October 29^th. This is a fun, costume-optional Halloween-themed walk-run that all of us CAN complete. Doesn't matter if you run, walk, or hobble.
More importantly, setting the Monster Dash as a goal and spending the three months gearing up for it, can be an integral part of starting your journey toward believing in yourself and LIVING! It worked for me. And yes, three months is enough time to get ready to complete a 3.15 mile race.
WHAT WE SUGGEST:
Before diving into any health improvement plan, you should visit your doctor for a health check-up. And while you are there, ask the doctor for a game plan to get you free - forever - of the need for pharmaceutical visits. Specifically, what do you need to do in order to dump the prescriptions for blood pressure, cholesterol, anti-depressants, diabetes, etc. And if he tells you it's not an option, FIND A NEW DOCTOR!!

Please email me at bellsong1 at gmail dot com and then join my wife, Minda, and I on Sunday July 31 at 2:00 pm

What If I...

What If * I... Lived?

*instead of growing old and giving up,

*instead of staring at the television for 4 hours each night,

*instead of a half-gallon of ice cream,

*instead of surfing the internet all night long,

*instead of cookies, cakes and candy,

*instead of driving to the grocery store – or Dairy Queen,

*instead of yet another reality TV show,

*instead of a whopper and fries,

*instead of making excuses,

*instead of doctors, drugs and medical devices...

In other words – what if I take charge of my life and live. Live healthy and wisely. Move, balance, choose intelligently. Walk instead of drive; run instead of walk! Set goals, strive for goals, and achieve goals. Don’t settle; don’t surrender – to age, weight, mental health or medical issues.

What if you do too?

I want to start a movement . I want to stir up a groundswell of friends helping friends get healthy and stay healthy. For the rest of my life. Their lives!

We just finished up a "Biggest Loser Weight Loss Contest" where I work and the net result is a couple of us lost a good amount of weight and a few of us lost a few pounds. And most of the contestants have accepted their failure to lose more than a pound or two and gone back to their way of life – which is not much of a life. Even the ones who lost a good amount of weight are ill-equipped to maintain or further that success if they don't stay focused (me included!) It was just a contest after all. I fear for them and me in the weeks ahead.

What If I... Lived is not a contest or a diet plan or a club. It is a lifestyle of support, encouragement, ideas and forgiveness. The ultimate goal is enjoying healthy, happy and fulfilling lives. If we lose weight along the way, so much the better! If we learn how to accept our flaws and still enjoy life, that is success. And if we encourage each other along the way, that helps us succeed!

Why Run?

I've been reading an awesome AWESOME book called "Born To Run" by Christopher McDougall. Did I mention this is an awesome book?? One of the scientists profiled in the book is so convinced - and convincing - that humans are designed for long-distance running that he believes if more people ran, there would be dramatically less cancer, heart disease, diabetes, etc.

But if those esoteric reasons aren't enough to convince you you should be running, here are a few more:
(borrowed with permission from the website: Half-Marathon Running)

1. Lose weight
Running gives your body a complete cardiovascular workout. This is most effective in losing weight – particularly in the waist and hips area. In fact, after you start running, you will start to shed inches from these areas. A lot of people take up running just for the sake of losing weight and stay with it because of the other benefits they receive.

2. Relieve stress
Your body will get into its own rhythm while running and the fresh breeze of air flowing against your face will send you in a different state of mind. Running helps to relieve stress and is in fact suggested by some experts as a cure for depression. While your body is concentrating on the run itself, your mind is in a relaxed state and looking for solutions. You will find that you get a lot of answers about your current issues while the mind is in a relaxed state. Serenity brings peace and relieves stress.

3. Connect with nature
Running will take you to the most beautiful parts of the world and give your eyes a feast of the scenic beauty around. Even if you run outside once a week, you can pick a different route every week to enjoy the beauty of nature. Just as the road seems different when you drive on the same road while coming and going, it will seem different when you are running. Running will connect you to the natural beauty around you, which you will not be able to identify while driving.

4. Delay Aging and Fight disease
Research has shown that the pace of aging depends on the level of physical activity. Regular physical activity such as running delays the aging and the age related changes in the nervous system - in particular - the reaction time. Running is said to reduce heart attack risks by strengthening the heart and lowering the blood pressure. Running also produces a stronger cardiovascular system and lowers cholesterol.

5. Increase social connections
Lot of running groups are available – many through your local running store and some through other running organizations. After you join one of this groups, you will meet a lot of runners who are passionate about the sport and increase your social connections.

6. Travel to different places
If you like to travel to different places, you are in for a real adventure. Running will take you to a lot of places. You can explore new places either during your training runs or your races. If you enjoy traveling, you can run a race in a different state or even run races in different countries.

7. Build confidence
Running builds a lot of confidence in people. If you lose weight by running, it boosts your confidence and increases your self-esteem. You are willing to run the extra mile the next week – not only in running but also in other aspects of life. If you look at what you have achieved when you first started running and compare it to where you currently are (see photo below), you will have an increased amount of self-confidence.

In six months of running - I lost 53 pounds!

8. Runners high
Ever heard of the famous runners high? It is pleasant state of euphoria achieved by runners. It is most commonly experienced during distance runs, which are a test of endurance. When the body is pushed to its limits in endurance runs, it produces endorphins to alleviate pain. These endorphins have different effect on different people – but they mainly send the body to a euphoric state.
[More recent studies show that it is not endorphins but a substance called endocannibinols - produced by the human brain and chemical cousin to the active ingredient in marijuana - that causes the runner's high. And it IS legal!]

9. Improve self
Running teaches about focus and determination. If you start running and building up on your runs every week to get into distance running, you will need a lot of determination and focus to run the last few miles. Increasing the mileage every week contributes to your focus and helps in improving one’s own self – it benefits the body, mind and the soul.

10. Connect with the sub-conscious mind
Running helps in connecting with the subconscious mind. When you are running, your body is doing all the work of propelling itself forward. Your mind is at peace and working to suggest solutions to questions or issues that you may have at hand. The best way to trigger the sub-conscious mind is to submit your question to your sub-conscious the night before the run. Sometime during the run, you will get an impulse of a thought. This thought may be the answer you are looking for or a path that will lead you to your ultimate answer.

2000 Calories?? I'll Starve!

I am amazed that at the end of the day, a 2000-calorie lifestyle is satisfying, sufficient and perfectly tasty. This coming from a man who could easily consume 3500+ calories in a day, back in the day.

There were many days—sometimes consecutive—when I would eat McDonald’s drive-thru for breakfast (2 sausage biscuits, no egg, hash brown, and a sugar-Coke), Burger King drive-thru for lunch (bacon double cheeseburger, large fries, sugar-Coke) and Taco Bell—drive thru, of course—for dinner (6-pack of crunchy tacos, a Mexi-melt and a sugar-Pepsi). Seriously. And I won't mention the DQ drive-thru!

But those days are history for me—52 pounds ago—and I haven’t tasted fast food in months. The closest I come to FF is Chipotle’s barbacoa bowl with extra lettuce, half-the-rice, pinto beans and cheese. And extra hot salsa. We’re talking fancy taco salad with 525 calories. It’s not petite, but it’s better than a 980-calorie cheeseburger, without fries! And it has healthy beans, lettuce, beef and a touch of cayenne-heat to stoke the metabolism up.

A more typical day consists of a breakfast stir-fry of sliced sausage link (Andouille is my favorite), low-cholesterol egg beaters (1/2 cup = 2 eggs), a handful of chopped up arugula lettuce, a sprinkle of cheese and salsa or pico de gallo. And I try to have this AFTER my morning run on the treadmill—research shows that you jump right into fat-burning mode when you exercise on an empty stomach.

A banana with low-fat yogurt makes for a great mid-morning snack. For lunch I'll have a LARGE salad with chopped-up meat—chicken Caesar salad is good with low-fat dressing and a squeeze of lemon juice. I’ve also had a salad with Indian-spiced chicken. And almonds!

One vital ingredient for salads for this former-burger-muncher: Quinoa. Pronounced KEEN-wah, this tiny grain-like seed boils up like rice with lots of flavor—and lots of protein and fiber, unlike rice. It has a nutty, earthy flavor and adds a whole new level of flavor to the salad. And lots of protein and fiber!

Dinner at home can be BIG. Curried chicken on quinoa and turmeric-fennel cabbage. Steak, salad and steamed veggies with a slice of homemade (bread machine) whole wheat bread. On the nights that I work, I usually take a meat-infused salad, yogurt and lots of fruit to lure me away from the snack machine int he break room.

Looking at my food diary, the last few days have ranged from 1918 to 2104 calories. I’m sure that’s a conservative number—I tend to look askance when I measure (or don’t measure) my portions. I usually mentally add 10% to my calorie count. But I know for certain I am well under 3500 calories. And most if not all of my menu is healthy and  balanced (I tried the low-carb route once upon a time and it worked – until I grew sick of it and went back to eating like a human! I'm reserving that plan for when I hit my "last 10-pound plateau").

If anything, I could probably cut down on fruits and up the veggies and fiber intake. But I’m not in a race to lose this weight. I have given myself until October 1 to reach goal weight AND change my eating habits. I’m well on my way to both goals with 35-ish pounds left to go and a newfound love of healthy eating. And quinoa. And occasional “bad days”. But no Fast Food!

I Hate(d) Running!

All my life if I could avoid running, I would. I loathed it. I despised it. If I was being chased by a grizzly I believe after 10 yards I would stop and try to reason with her.

But today I ran the Get Lucky 7K. Not only did I run it, I ran the first 3K non-stop, I slowed to a walk for a total of maybe 2 minutes, and I still finished it in 47 minutes 34 seconds. Me - the fat and 48 year-old guy. Here's the proof:

Notice the cool medallion hanging around my neck? Notice the sweat on my shirt? (and it was under 40 degrees outside!) Notice the beer nearly gone? Notice the fairly slim body - Holy Cow!!! - I just noticed the fairly slim body!! I look gooooood!

Anyway, the whole point of this post is this: as much as I hated running most my life, after 2.5 months of training for this, I have discovered that my muscles actually want to run. Hard. Fast! Unfortunately, my lungs are still trying to keep up - but I'll give them the practice they need. Eventually they will be able to keep up.

I know this because I know Who is in charge. And since He can make my muscles want to run, He can make my lungs want to supply the oxygen needed to run that hard. I'll just keep practicing while I wait on Him to provide the lung power to keep up.

This is me living. Not giving up. Getting healthy - I'm down 32 pounds since January 1! I am so enjoying the life God gave me to enjoy.

Even enjoying running.

Here's another picture of me - with my muse, Minda: